Conor McCarthy

View Original

Whats the story, boss?

Photo by Art Lasovsky on Unsplash

“What’s the story” is a common Irish greeting, which can be heard everywhere from the pub to the living room.

Growing up, I never thought much of it. It was just one of those phrases that was “there”, and had been “there” since before I was born.

But what if it’s meaning actually runs deeper than a greeting? What if the person asking us “Whats the story” is asking us what story is running through our head right that moment?

Because we all do that. Tell stories. Thats all we do. Its probably the most fundamental part of our cognitive operating system. The stories we tell ourselves (most of which usually don't change much over time) are the building blocks of our beliefs about ourselves and the world. Pretty important.

And I’m willing to bet that the stories you tell yourself aren’t that kind. You would never speak to another person the way you speak to yourself. So what if we didn’t tell ourselves the same mean story as yesterday? We have a choice in every moment to create a new story, and change the course of our thoughts, our feelings, our actions. The moment we make that choice is the moment we have true power over ourselves and experience agency.

My old story of how I binge eat when I'm depressed becomes a new story about the respect I have for my body.

My old story about how I was wronged by a friend becomes a new story about how I can forgive, and mend bridges.

My old story about how I couldn’t possibility learn a new skill becomes a new story about the possibility that I could take a first step.

Why not make the choice to tell ourselves the best story we can right now?